Third World Writer

Emotions is an old manga Dust and I tried making back in college, about five gods who’ve come to Earth in search of a powerful artifact hidden in a highschool student. We based the characters on our classmates (who hasn’t written stories based on their classmates?) and of course casted ourselves as the two main bad guys/gods. ^__^ It followed the normal high school lives of three friends who soon find their world falling apart when a transfer student arrives, when honor students commit suicide, and when close friends start killing each other after school.

Each of the five gods represented an emotion (if I remember correctly: Sorrow, Love, Anger, Joy and Desire), hence the unimaginative title. Although I remember very little of the original story we made, and forgot all about it until Dust posted about it yesterday, it does have a bit of potential that I think I might want to try it again someday. ^_^

After numerous plot outlines and character design drafts and studies in paneling, Dust and I managed to finish only two pages of our manga before school events got in the way. But still these two pages, however noob-ish, convinced me that some things really weren’t impossible. =)

Terrible, just terrible.

I should have 11,669 words by now, and I’m nowhere near that number. Worse yet, my plot seems to be falling apart. After getting stuck on a scene for more than an afternoon, I decided to outline my entire story, chapter by chapter, breaking things down to specific scenes and what happens in them. And then I realized that my characters didn’t really have much to do.

If I continue things as they are, pretty soon my flimsy plot is gonna rip, and even the characters will be wondering what the heck they’re supposed to be doing. They need a reason to be meeting, to be doing the things they’re doing, and the Devil (I have a Devil character) needs a reason for not just gobbling the world up and spitting it out (he can do that if he wanted to, you know). I need a reason for everything, and the reasons just don’t seem to be coming to me.

I’m considering changing stories. The Hand of God is a great concept, but trying to make it fit NaNoWriMo I tried putting the concept and characters into a forced plot that was bound to unravel. And now, 6055 words into my story, things are starting to make no sense. Hrm.

(Still, I love my characters. ^__^ I can’t wait to create a plot that they would fit nicely into.)

So. What to do, what to do? Should I proceed with this thing, try to make it work along the way, eventually either landing Gold or falling in Shite? Or should I go with a plot I’ve been working on for years that’s sure to have less kinks in its fabric but doesn’t have much of a theme? Or, there’s this other story I’m considering that I haven’t spent much time thinking about, but has the potential for a solid plot, some romance and really wicked action?

*le sigh* This NaNoWriMo business is tough.

I think for now I’ll work out the plot lines of these three things, and by midnight I’ll (hopefully) decide what to go with. And then, I’ll work like hell to catch up with the word count. I’m already more than five thousand words behind schedule.

Darn it.

(p.s. Shameless plug – I’m posting my nanowrimo progress here. Please nag me.)

Ending day three of NaNoWriMo, where I should have clocked 5000 words, I’m 1171 words behind schedule and just started Chapter Three. I must say, seeing the word counts of some people (at 9000, 10000) kinda makes me feel insecure. ^__^ But that’s okay, easy does it.

I realized today that I might be doing all this for nothing. I mean, I’m writing a story that will never get published, and probably no more than two people will ever read because, well.. without intending to be anti-Christian, it kinda is. (This is based on my guess that if you portray Jesus as an idiot human who was tricked by the Devil into thinking he was the Son of God, then you’re anti-Christian).

At any rate, I also realized today that even if no one will ever read this story, I think I’ll finish it anyway. There’s a certain satisfaction to be had when you see the ideas in your head actually flesh out into words and sentences and chapters.

“Hey, I wrote a whole chapter!” I want to say. “This one is about a boy who made a sandwich.”

Chapter Two – A World of Invisible People – DONE

So today was my first day with NaNoWriMo, and I must say, this is tough. My eyes are shot, my knees hurt from sitting in my bed for so long, brain is just about ready to shut down. But yes, I did it. Two hours late but I did it. That’s one chapter and 2027 words in the bank.

The story I decided to write is entitled The Hand of God. It’s about a group of people who find that they each possess one of the “abilities” of Jesus mentioned in the Bible. There is a country girl who can calm storms, a yuppie who can multiply food, a janitor who can heal the sick, a prostitute who can walk on water, a policewoman who can raise the dead, a priest who can exorcise demons, a family man who resurrects three days after being killed, an atheist who can turn water to wine, a homeless man who knows the future, a teenager who can command living things to wither, an old man who set foot in heaven, a young boy who talks like he knows everything, and a teacher who has visions of God. The story is about each of their personal struggles and internal conflicts as they deal with their unusual abilities, and as they discover the reason behind them.

This is not a religious story, to be sure.. If anything, it’s probably even blasphemous. -____-

Chapter One – Goodbye Mr. Timothy, DONE.

A few days ago I heard an interesting story on the MRT speakers. You might have heard something similar.

One day, a ship sank, leaving a single survivor stranded alone on a deserted island. Having lost everything, the man prayed to God to save him as he scanned the horizons looking for rescue boats. None came. He built himself some shelter, gathered some food, and continued praying and praying and scanning the horizons, day after day after day. Still no one came. Finally, after gathering some fruit from the forest, he returned to his hut to find it in flames, sending a thick dark column of smoke into the blue sky. Now thoroughly frustrated and angry at God, the man cursed and cried “How could you abandon me in my greatest time of need?!” But then after a few hours, to his surprise, a ship approached his island and came to his rescue.

“How did you find me here?” he asked the ship’s captain.

“Why, we saw your smoke signal of course!”

The lesson of the story, according to the narrator, was that when life gets you down, don’t lose faith; what may seem like a disaster to you might actually be life’s smoke signal beckoning the grace of God.

Aww.

What a ridiculous lesson.

This story, though most people might not notice, actually illustrates three things I would think of as some forms of sin, in one way or another: an abuse of prayer, an over-dependence on God, and gross inaction as a result of faith. And because these three things aren’t directly addressed in the story, it’ll come as a subliminal message to those who haven’t been paying attention that they might be acceptable behavior, just as long as one doesn’t lose faith. Which is why I find stories like this one quite irresponsible.

I’m not about to go so far as to suggest that these are exclusively Christian behaviors, no sir. But having grown up among Catholics and having been surrounded by devout Christians for most of my life, I can’t help but notice that I know a lot of people who are as faithfully helpless as the man in the story. In times of dire difficulty their first instinct is to pray and have faith that He will provide, and if that doesn’t work they increase their devotion by going to church more often, or asking friends to pray for them. Only when things get unbearable, or when they “lose faith” do they take things into their own hands, and by that time there’s little that can be done.

I have nothing against faith, I want to make that clear. Neither do I have anything against God or prayer. I happen to think quite highly of the three. But when the things you believe cultivate a mentality of dependence and helplessness, I have to think perhaps we have different perspectives on faith, God and prayer. So allow me to offer another story, and a different lesson, about a man with a different kind of faith.

One day, a ship sank, leaving a single survivor stranded alone on a deserted island. Believing that God would not leave him stranded without the means to get himself home, he prayed for the clarity of mind to recognize the things that God had provided him. He then set off to search the island. Before long he found leaves with which he built a hut, and flint to start a small fire. Realizing that the smoke from his fire stood out distinctly against the blue sky, he threw in more fuel to make a smoke signal. Shortly after, a rescue ship came and took him home, but not before he offered a prayer of thanks to God.

Aww.

There are a number of lessons to this story:

God is not your slave. He does not “provide” when you call, because he “has already provided” before you even asked. If you believe that God “provides”, faith becomes a license to do nothing. If you believe that God “has provided”, faith becomes the confidence that you can do anything.

Times of difficulty are not troubles, they are trials which you are expected to overcome using all that God has provided – your resources, your skills, and your own understanding. I like to think that if God needs to bail you out of your trial, you have probably failed miserably.

Prayer is a direct phone line to God and should not be used to ask for the blessings he has already provided. Do not ask for shortcuts, he has provided a road. Do not ask for answers, he has provided your mind. Do not ask for perfection, he has provided hope. Ask only for inspiration and patience.

And if there is any one welcome reason to call, it should be to thank him.